HOW DO YOU OPEN YOUR HEART ONCE AGAIN AFTER IT’S BEEN BROKEN?
Hey beautiful’s,
How “do” we open our hearts to receive after its been broken?
Rather than writing a piece on telling you what to do, I feel I want to share with you some of my experience. My story.
I remember hearing a few years ago a saying –
“One can only receive your love as deep as they have met themselves.”
Upon hearing this at first I disagreed, I could see the world around me, the way we are limitedly conditioned to believe about love and relationships, and I could see many that loved others, were openly receiving that love, but yet didn’t love themselves. So this quote didn’t make sense.
Over time I’ve found myself return to this quote . Again, I’ve pondered over if I see the truth behind the words. What I see is that through our healing and evolving it’s not about how much you love the other person, it’s about how deep can you receive that love they are also reflecting back to you. Where both love each other equally – but to receive that love back or should I say that deep love – is dependent upon how deep they have met themselves and opened their own heart to receive. And this comes only by how they love themselves and the knowing of their worth.
As I grew up I guess I had never really had my heart smashed from a boyfriend/partner when young. When I look back now, I had many unpleasant and traumatic things happen around the masculine, but in terms of being in a relationship and being dumped or heartbroken, it never really happened to me that way.
I only had 2 main boyfriends in my life back then and one became my husband. Both those relationships when they finished were a result of me breaking them off or ending my marriage. As heartbreaking as it was to end my marriage (yes it wasn’t one of those breakups where it was easy for the person leaving) I did go through heartbreak. But I had never really been in a position where I had completely laid my heart out so openly through complete vulnerability and someone had smashed it to pieces. YET.
As I moved through my life after my divorce I met a few men here and there before meeting my Twin Flame/soul. And prior to meeting my one, my beloved - I had my heart smashed by another male into a million pieces. I prefer to leave the details of that storyline private, however, one thing I knew for sure was that, although I had experienced many other broken hearted moments in my life from other people- this feeling was different. This time I was laying my heart on the line wide open in every way declaring my love so vulnerably.
I’m sure what I am sharing has been shared a million times, by other men and women around the globe. However, it gets more interesting.
The love I was to experience was on a whole different level to when I came face to face with my beloved twin soul, (as those of us with this love know) and since then it’s been a roller coaster of emotion. What I see know that I couldnt then was that he was also to show me how to heal my pain from those previous loves through his reflection of our soul.
Remembering, healing, transmuting, growing, evolving, ascending, showing each other the mirror as this love and connection does. It’s the most amazing experience and love of existence and I’m in such gratitude to be on this journey with my beloved on the path we were chosen to come to earth for. But as we know, it’s not all been rainbows and butterflies.
When we face ourselves through this love – our soul mirroring – from them /each other, because we are each other, we are them and they are us just in 2 physical bodies, is why it pushes us to the inside where we do all our inner childhood work to release all the old programing and conditioning, pain, fear, wounds etc. I won’t go deeper into the role of twin flames in this blog piece but we all know how it works.
When they break our hearts in pieces and we do the same to them - it’s clearly about something in us that needs healing, and we are reflecting that to the other to show them where they need to heal and not resist any longer. Where we/they have unconsciously blocked trauma etc and we shine our light on this for them to go in and heal it.
It’s actually a very beautiful process when you really understand the truth of true love one soul connections and how that love heals each other in all ways. Healing our mental, physical, emotional and spiritual bodies, all through our one combined energy field and consciousness
But until you get to understand this we often look at it from an outside perspective, from the conditioning we have grown up with, what others are saying and the interference of 3rd parties input to something they don’t understand or have any idea about - so we also see it differently. Until we realize that our conditioned programing around love and relationships that have been generationally taught is unhealthy and toxic, we don’t realize the bigger picture of unconditional love and how to reach that.
Your beloved twin is the only person on earth that can help you heal and release all this old toxic energy and patterning to reach your true self and authenticity, more than anyone else can. Including yourself!
I spent years healing, with my beloved shining the light on every area that I needed to look inside, I mean every area, he left nothing unturned for me. He shone his light in every dark corner of my being, every place I had shut down, closed up and unconsciously never desired to revisit. Places I held pain, trauma and Pandora boxes!!! Places I hadn’t discovered that were there and places I had not visited since a child – oh that inner child work – yes and it can be a doozy.
As they reflect this to us, or I prefer to say they shine their light like a torch, it shows us where we need to walk through our darkness to face and release our conditioned fears & trauma. And in most cases their torch shines on dark places we didn’t even know existed, as we had so successfully blocked them out. We do this to each other so we can heal, grow, evolve and free ourselves to meet this love in balance, and as time went on I would see the blessing my twin was giving me and what I to, was giving him. Each time I felt healed and ready for union he would show me another dark spot, by us reflecting things to each other, and each time my heart got broken it took time for me to heal. Although, in essence, it was me healing from my own wounds.
As time moves on we do both create some pain for each other by this process, however, again, it’s only created from the place of our own consciousness at the time. Each time my heart broke I could see why, where I perhaps needed to go deeper in my own self-love, my worthiness, my honor, because each time I was either being co-dependent on him (which I had never been on anyone in my life) because I wasn’t loving myself – and each time he taught me how to step further into my self-mastery to reach my full sovereignty. And although sometimes the pain was unbearable, it caused as the catalyst for me to evolve even greater. You see when we get hurt, our emotions and feelings process this from the level of consciousness we see at that time. When we start to see this from a higher prospective – from love and not fear - it all makes sense.
So, back to my original question or maybe it’s an answer I’m trying to give, one thing I know is. Sometimes our minds are so overshadowed with ego and fear we don’t even see it until it’s too late, and we have reacted to a situation in a way from our fear instead of our truth and heart.
– So how do we, after each time, pick ourselves up again after the healing process and re-open our hearts. Well that’s the 64 thousand dollar question. Buts its easy, its unconditional love for yourself and your beloved. However, the one common thread I hear is when the Divine feminine has reached that place completely of self-respect, to honor herself in every way through this process, we often can block receiving our Divine Masculine’s love a little without realizing through concern that they may dishonor and disrespect us again. Because most feminine can’t always see how the masculine has helped them grow in ways I have mentioned above.
The last time my twin broke my heart it was done in a very dishonorable and disrespecting way to me, I was flawed, because it involved a 3rd party situation with much lies and deceit. I possibly didn’t react all that well as I was in complete and utter shock. However, later I could see the way I approached the situation was from my own fear, and I could see at our soul level we were working together to help each other bring out the truth in the physical, and this is why the situation arose. I never felt anger, pain, just sadness that we had both dishonored ourselves, our love, our soul so greatly.
Why did I go straight to that place of such sadness of this dishonoring? Well it makes sense, as this is such a sacred love between each other and for us to be trying to tear that apart instead of honoring and bringing it together saddened me deeply.
So back to the heart and how do we open once again? Trust, trust our soul and the love we know. The unconditional love you have inside of you for yourself, your soul, your beloved, trusting that and having faith that an open heart with unconditional love, will one day be enough to bring two lights one soul together, over shadowing any fears and just being LOVE.
Letting go of any fear, feeling nothing but the love and being open to receive. Our hearts are very resilient and when we learn to shine our own light on any spots of resistance, than we can truly open wide in gratitude.
And this is how “one can only receive another’s love as deeply as they have met themselves”
Don’t be afraid to speak your truth – thank you for listening.
Much love
Kellie